Busy week of Improv

Last week I had two grad shows to the public along with an Improv Summer camp. Originally, I had only signed up for a Narrative form but the theatre manager sent a request for more sign ups to the Harold II class as there weren’t enough people. I felt it would suck for those that wanted to pursue Harold if the class was cancelled so I volunteered to join. Mentally, it was very taxing to have two improv classes every week and having to practice with plenty of stage time. While I did enjoy the classes, it normally takes me a day or two to recharge. Two classes a week was a bit much and I had a tough time motivating myself to get out more this Summer because of it.

Harold

I skipped over detailing my experience in the Harold I class. While I really liked the class, we were 16 class members at times. Our instructor had little time to coach all of us or give sufficient stage time even with an additional 30 minutes he volunteered freely.  The first few classes we had a lot of fun but as time went on, we were tripping over ourselves. I felt our practice performances were getting worse the further we were asked to carry the ideas we originally had into the later stages of the show. To compensate for this, we were instructed to play as mundane as possible from start.

Several of us went to the Sunday workshops to get the stage time we were hoping for to mixed results. We performed two Harolds, one was well received, the other poor. Going into the grad show, everyone I spoke to in the class weren’t confident we’d have a good show. Whether the lack of practice or the mind set going in, we had a mediocre show. I am not blameless either. I felt the same way going in and did not invite any friends or my parents to watch. Harold has a very specific format and we were thrown out of whack by one of the other classmates who screwed up the sequence. This lead to some confusion and we had a hard time getting back on track.

The reduced class number for Harold II was more welcome and we had plenty of opportunity to practice. However, I found a major obstacle in the class because of crazy work hours and being told during the first class we had to start the show as mundane as possible. This led to our scenes not really going anywhere in the first segment, which gave us little to work in the later parts of the show. I experimented with trying to add interesting elements for later in the show but these were not projected well enough for later use by myself or the others.

Nevertheless, I was asked to perform as an opener for the local house team by our Harold II instructor to which I agreed. Again, our show proved mediocre in my view. With the same class mate mixing up the order as during our Harold I grad show. However, the house team had an amazing set with the same format because they did introduce comedic elements from the get go. This hearkened back to the first classes. The next week, I asked for clarification on the “mundane”. Our instructor clarified that we have to leave ourselves room to heighten the absurdity or comedy of our original scene later in the show.

Our grad show was very well received and in many ways the most rewarding of all my performances because of the challenges and initial “failure” of a bad show. Strangely enough, what made the show for me was a screw up by yours truly. I joined someone on stage who was pretending to play with LEGOs. I joined him in doing so. His face turned to the audience, he said “Dad, I really appreciate you helping me build this LEGO tower.” I didn’t hear him say “Dad” and so my response was: “I want to be an architect when I grow up”. He immediately called me out on the mistake saying “But dad, you already are a grown up!” Quickly, I flipped the scene about my character undergoing a mid-life crisis and playing with LEGOs as a way to re-capture my youth. This morphed into the theme of the show. Later scenes had my character wanting to re-live his teenage years while his son was off to his first day of work. A group game involving what to do during a mid-life crisis, a scene about the inability to relate to younger generations, another series of scenes of someone wanting to live forever, “hazing” in prison and university before mixing everything together in a hodge podge of hilarity!

It is definitely a format I enjoy despite the struggle because there are plenty of moving pieces; it feels like playing an improv chess board with every move potentially significant later on.

Narrative

Our narrative class did not face the same struggles. Rather, because of summer vacations and real life our class lost three people by the time the show came around. Nevertheless, we performed a good show with few hiccups. Following the Pixar format, we alternated between hindering and helping our main protagonist Barry Pilkerton and his desire to convert his gas station in his home town of Winnipeg Manitoba to full service. His character was inspired to make the change while vacationing in Oregon.

We had some fantastic scenes and some great lines like “I find tipping morally objectionable.” and “Just get that thing out of me [referring to the gas hose]”. We struggled to raise the stakes and forced a few scenes. One of my scene partners was trying to convince someone to kill Barry and it felt very forced and out of tune with the rest of the story. This led to the story derailing into a far more violent tone than everything preceding it. My favourite scene was one where four of us were pretending to be in our cars waiting to be served with the main character struggling to keep up. We would complain or request service to make Barry feel overwhelmed, argue about how much should we tip, before gradually all of us drove off across the street to the new self-service station.

The show ended when Barry, disgruntled, attempted to blow up his rival but seeing how insane that was, he decided to simply go to Oregon to live out the rest of his days. He left the station to his former assistant who exclaimed. “First policy change, NO TIPPING!”

The show definitely impressed my [first] date. We had a great conversation but sadly, she didn’t feel enough of a spark to envision a long term romantic relationship between us. She did agree to remain friends though. While disappointed, I do feel improv has made me more open and a better conversationalist.

Improv Camp

Over the weekend, I and 35 others attended an improv summer camp. Mixed in between the regular camp activities (kayaking, archery, swimming, etc) we had improv workshops. In many ways, these were more refreshers of lessons from previous levels but with a focus of fine tuning for those of us who were at higher levels. After spending so much time learning formats and how to construct a show, it was a good reminder on scene work.

The biggest challenge for me was being surrounded by a large group of people for an extended amount of time. While I am not afraid of crowds, I find it mentally draining to be around more than 3-4 people for long periods of time. However, it never ceases to amaze me how charming and welcoming the community is. The only time I felt uncomfortable was during the dance party where I had a pounding headache from the obnoxious club music, strobe lights and packed crowd. Once about half the crowd cleared out I felt better although some IB profin definitely provided an assist.

Monday hit me like a ton of bricks though. I had resolved to do some household chores but I needed to recharge mentally. I ended up putting it off until today because I was just mentally exhausted. Nevertheless, I want to go back next year! Spending so much time around the other improvisers of the community allowed us to discuss topics more in depth and getting to know one another more than just passing acquaintances. I was still the “odd duck” of the pack but I never felt particularly excluded except of my own doing.

 

Building Characters #3: Goals

One of the challenges I face writing my murder mystery (besides my old computer hard drive crashing with it) was trying to give the characters varied motives to murder the victim or motives and goals outside of the deed itself. One of the RPG campaigns I am involved with more or less died over the holidays as one player decided to tear up his character sheet. He lost interest as the game master is very poor at planning his schedule and so we had long periods between sessions. The rest of the group had a discussion on the topic of the future of the campaign. This in turn spun into a discussion on what we were looking for in the game from both a player and character perspective.

One thing that struck me was one of the players, who I had been playing with for almost 20 years, expressed criticism for how we create our groups of characters. Often times, when someone starts a campaign the game master (GM) gives a brief context of the setting and everyone creates their character on their own. However, without giving the details of the story or plot the game master would follow, the player ends up with very bland characters or those who are not involved actively in the game. Rather, he spends most of his time flipping through rulebooks and thinking about creating a new character. This certainly explains how in the past, he often would go through dozens of characters in some campaigns. We interpreted this as indecisiveness or fickleness. Instead, his comment was he felt his character didn’t “fit in”. Rather, he wanted to create a new character who would fit into the narrative. Now, the fault can be spread to the GM and other players not integrating him more, but in the end he also has to be pro-active. In this case, he is purely a passive observer.

The other player, who I referred to in the previous post, was purely a tourist. I use the term tourist as the character’s only goal was to meet new people and see new things. Now, there is something to be said about wanderlust or the desire for adventure. This character was just touring the setting and had no intention of creating ties to the area beyond acquaintances and being an attention whore at social gatherings. He further explained what he looks for in a RPG experience is for the world, story, characters to influence his character. Essentially, his character is more or less a blank slate with some basic characteristics: usually a slutty hedonist, with a bit of an innocent streak. However, the player is quite perceptive and pragmatic. He projects these traits onto the character which makes the innocence come off as fake.

Now, both of these approaches are fine. However, these put the responsibility on others to pull them in and get them to invested. These are somewhat passive approaches which works fine for say a story on rails. However, the sand box nature of the campaign itself left them hanging in the wind, waiting for something to happen while I was going about exploring what could be done. The fourth player who tore up his sheet was more or less involved but he had a shared goal with me.

Step 1: Identifying the game

Now, my character creation process is dependent on what type of game we are playing and who is running the game. I adapt to the circumstances ahead of time. I’ll probe and ask questions to better suit the narrative and gameplay. The more complex the game setting or plot, the more likely I try to make a more complex character. Or if it is a game I dislike but play for the benefit of the group, I’ll play something I find interesting for myself. RPGs, unlike many other types of games, possess a more social aspect. Everyone contributes in one way or another be it through the social interaction, the gaming, or just bringing snacks to the table. So the first step is asking:

• What type of campaign or story will it be?
• Is this something I want to explore or take part in?
• How can I (including the character-proxy) contribute or advance the story?

The answers will be different in each case but also mean different things to different individuals. A hack and slash dungeon crawl might mean a tactical challenge to someone while to another it is an opportunity to show off their mastery of game mechanics through power-gaming. Both are perfectly valid styles. These interpretations should then inform the players what role they will play and what type of character could best represent it with their view of the game.

In the example above, the player viewing it as a tactical challenge would likely make a tactical and intelligent character. One who relies on his or her wits to overcome challenges. What factored into this characters’ development to be this way? How will it inform her future actions? What drives her to do so?

Step 2: Group Cohesion

A major pitfall is conflicting interests within a group. This creates conflict between the players and is likely to bog down or slow the game down. In more extreme cases, this can hurt personal relationships between the players. Now, conflicting interests and competing interests are not the same thing. The former are in direct opposition while the others can be compromised upon. The former has to be handled very deftly by the players and the game master.

I find many groups go through different phases of maturity in gaming. The first, often formed through more “simplistic” games like D&D involves a very basic principle. You are a team and need to work together to accomplish the goals as given to you. The GM can steer the group as a whole without too much concern for motivating every single member.

Next comes the backstabbing phase. Often times this expresses itself with players wanting to play an “evil group” or playing more political games like Vampire: the Masquerade. The players want to break out of the initial good vs evil trope of medieval fantasy inspired by Lord of the Rings. This is when several players will begin creating their own goals, even if it is to fuck over their comrades over perceived slights. The challenge is to channel these interests towards the same objective without breaking the group. In my experience, the “evil group” games tend to have a very short shelf-life. The Vampire the Masquerade games tend to have more staying power but often devolve into solo scenes held in secret rather than involve everyone.

Now, our current group failed at the final phase of gaming maturity. This phase has players and their surrogate characters develop goals and work in tandem instead of at cross-purposes. We had little group cohesion not because of character conflicts but we had little to do with one another. In the end, there has to be a unifying quality to the goal(s), even if it is something very personal. You need the help of others to accomplish it as you cannot do it alone suffices. This must be established both in game and out of character to work. I and another player explicitly stated and established what dynamic, goals and roles we would play. The other two players ignored us to varying degrees. The first didn’t take into account the other characters whatsoever, the second played what he wanted and gave only a bit of effort to try to establish a working relationship. Thus, our group never meshed.

Step 3: Goals

Now that we’ve settled the framework, we need to establish what we would like to accomplish within. Simplistic stories of “you must save the world from destruction” are fairly straightforward. You live in said world. It would kind of suck for it to be destroyed while you are still on it. You have a built in investment towards the overarching goal.

You need to establish the motivation your character has towards the overall theme. Taking the example of the group, if you are someone looking to be influenced by the events of the world, this requires for you to get involved in them. Interact with others and the plot and not just sit idly around.

I attended an improv workshop two weekends ago. We had an exercise where we had to enumerate 5 desires a person might have. A one line description of the person was provided to us by someone else. So for example, I was given an office worker assigned to a very small cubicle. The five desires I chose were:

1. To get an actual office.
2. Tell off his boss.
3. Make it to Friday’s “5@7”
4. Go out on a date with the cute girl in accounting.
5. His favourite sports team winning the championship.

The first four are very much in line with the person’s occupation. The last one adds depth to the character by showing he isn’t defined solely by his profession. This is often a “trap” we fall when we view our characters as a role or class. Certainly, in a more “adventuring” type game, the primary goal or ambition of the character could be steered towards that path. Adding unrelated or tangential goals adds depth.

4. Motivations

Now that you have defined what your character wishes to accomplish, you need to decide the “why” or motivation behind it. Why does your character want to kill the evil wizard? Fame, fortune, revenge, doing the right thing, etc? The follow-up to that is determine why this is important. If you want revenge; revenge for what? Why does this wrong need to be avenged? You can go quite in depth about a motivation or desire as you peel more and more layers. It’s up to the player or performer to figure out how deep in this process he is willing to go.

A similar exercise we had this past Wednesday in improv class was to play word associations with ourselves in the form of rants. We had to rant about a topic chosen by the audience for as long as we could. We were then asked to define why this was important to us and finally what would happen if the topic was no longer a problem. I’m not a whiner or complainer by nature but rather someone who tries to figure out the root cause and eventually find a solution. Therefore, this exercise was difficult for me to string a rant longer than a few seconds on mundane topics. I often found myself frustrated by the solutions being overlooked or ignored more than the “problem” itself. Nevertheless, it was a fun exercise to discover how far we can go down this line of thought and perhaps find what is at the core of a character. Once found, it helped flesh out how he or she might feel towards other things.

5. Action!

The last part is to act upon these goals but also determine the stakes. What are you prepared to do to accomplish your goals?

Singing is on the to do list though.

How much does the character or person value this goal? What are you willing to risk? What is your personal stake? These can certainly change over time. A character might become more passionate or come to the realization the goal was superficial or fleeting. However, character development is another topic for another day. What is important is the individual act upon these rather than wait for them to be handed over. Something we can apply to our own lives.

 

 

Improv: Practice show

With our public show on the 27th fast approaching, I and several of my classmates attended the Sunday workshop at the school. While most of the class was there, only three of us participated in the public show. I won’t lie and will admit I was reticent to sign up. I’ve performed some – pretty – embarrassing songs at Karaoke, but this was partially different. In Karaoke, everyone is involved and if you pick a popular song there is a sing along element. Plus, there is always that one person who is probably worse than you are.

Unless you’re this guy.

However, the level 4 class participating with us was very supportive and explained to what we had to do. Nevertheless, I was nervous despite showing no outward signs. Once I jumped up on stage with the rest of my scene partners, the bright lights reduced my vision to only the first two rows and the nervousness melted away as our performance went on. We took part in three improv games.

No “S”

Your lines of dialogue must not include the letter “S” in any way. We were given as inspiration the word “canoe”. It was funny to see everyone fumble their lines trying to avoid the dreaded “S” and the crowd’s shouts of “DIE!” eliminating us from the game. By the time, my turn came around, I called out there was a waterfall up ahead and began miming paddling vigorously at counter-current. My scene partner simply replied with a “Yup”. Unfortunately, I accidentally slipped when I asked her “How can you be so unfazed in the face of danger!?!?!” and lost.

Word Restriction

The next game involved my two classmates and I where we were limited in the number of words we could use in our dialogue. I was given a 5 word limit, the others 2 and 3 respectively. Our inspiration from the audience was “cardboard”. I took the lead and mimicked being beneath a box.

As I had the most words permitted in my dialogue, I was largely driving the narrative from a descriptive point of view where as my partners were providing the actions. When the women noticed something in the distance. I cut open a hole at the top of my box and spotted a giant hamster. The beast began charging at us and so we fled to finish the scene.

BING!

No, not the less popular search engine but rather the name of the game. All 7 of us (including the level 4 team) were on stage and would kneel at the center of the stage. Every time the host hit a bell, some of us would stand up and begin performing a scene. Once the host lost interest or felt the scene hit a gag, he’d hit the bell again and those in the scene would kneel back down, and 1 or more of those kneeling would stand up and begin anew.

Our first scene was inspired by the word “Unicorn”. Everyone began to hesitate so I pretended to gallop astride a majestic unicorn across half the stage. Another improviser either didn’t catch it or went for a gag and said “Ok, male kangaroo you can get on the Ark.” For most of the remainder of the scene, I hopped in place as everyone else continued with the dialogue until the 4th and final person in the scene pretended to be a unicorn. It ended when I brought attention to Noah that the Unicorn was a unique being. Despite the protests of the Unicorn, he was not allowed on board.

I was involved in another scene where we were taking a tour of the amazon. The comedy came as my partner, another man, called me “honey”. In response, I moved in close and embraced him to a raucous response from the crowd. Our tour guide continued to describe some of the animals in the rain forest. Sadly, the scene ended before I wanted to say “It’s settled. We’re buying it.”  to spin it as a real estate sale rather than the implied tour guide.

Feedback

Following our performance, we were given feedback by the workshop teacher. Besides stating the audience seemed to enjoy the performance, he only gave us negative feedback which disappointed my fellow classmates. On the other hand, there was only 1 or two elements per person. The feedback I received was I was making too much noise on the scene while I was hopping up and down as a kangaroo. I actually recognized this somewhat as the scene went on and stopped hopping when I was delivering dialogue. Afterwards we spoke to each other and to our classmates who stayed to watch but hadn’t participated in the show. Whatever positive reinforcement we needed, they quickly provided which was much appreciated. Only 8 days to go for the real thing!

Improv 3: The Big Show

I’ve been fairly busy of late, combined with my personal computer dying, I haven’t had a chance to update lately. Level 3 improv classes started back the 2nd week of September. Unlike the previous classes, there is a graduation requirement beyond attendance: a public show.

Unlike previous classes, I am the only man, So while the group has been amazing, I still occasionally find myself feeling awkward as I do not want to mistakenly offend anyone during scenes by being too over the top either. Luckily, one of the other classmates is good at playing the really overbearing douche/alpha male which makes things easier 🙂

That said, so far we’ve mostly retread similar exercises we’ve performed in level 2 except our new instructor really delves deeper into the subject. Her style differs in I would compare our level 2 instructor to be a masters teacher who expects you to figure it out on your own while in level 3, she is more like a cool high school teacher. An example of a more advanced exercise might have us have to pass multiple word patterns to multiple people at once to heighten our awareness of what is going on around us.

One of the new concepts introduced to us was “the Game”.

No, not him.

Games in improv, at least how this was presented to us, was akin to a sort of running gag or escalating joke in a performance. For example, in one scene I was working on repairing a door with rusty hinges. My partners were giving me various lubricants to fix it. Each time, they would offer me oil in increasingly bulkier containers. Meanwhile, I was voicing over the sounds of the door differently with each one. In this instance, there were 2 games. The changing sounds of the door and the ever growing size of the containers and how we interacted with them.

Other lessons focused on becoming more aware of the different “offers” our scene partners might be projecting either physically (body language or actions) or verbally (the words or tone). One such exercise had us repeat the dialogue of our partners so we might have more time to reflect on what was said. Another had us purely begin with very mundane conversations without trying to be funny. The latter made the conversations feel more natural and less stilted. So if we were to then introduce a funny element, it would have more impact to the audience.

While I understood the lessons in level 2, I feel the group as a whole is more comfortable and mastering these concepts in level 3 which makes for a better back and forth between us all. Our big show will be October 27th. So wish me luck!

Improv Level 2 Recap

Work and real life have been pretty hectic as of late which has kept me from updating the blog as much as I’d like. Thankfully,  I’ve caught up and finally able to post an update on my progress through improv.

We started level 3 (more on that Wednesday). Prior to the start of our first class, one of my new classmates had mentioned she opted  to take the Saturday class in the previous session as she didn’t like the style of the teacher I had. This sentiment was echoed by others who did go through level 2 with me. They felt they didn’t understand his instructions or guidance. To be clear, his style was a rhetorical one. For example, if we seemed to be going off the rails or without direction in a scene, he’d ask “What is your character’s relationship with the other?” This confused my fellow classmates as they needed more direction on where to go. Perhaps it is my introspective nature, but I actually preferred his method as it allowed me to improve my characterization on stage. Each class had a theme, but my fellow classmates struggled to articulate what it was. In the interest of my own reflection, and if they want my thoughts on it, I’ve decided to write a recap of those classes I didn’t cover previously.

Do the Locomotion

This class focused on movement. The exercises focused on choosing an action and later creating a character who these actions would be associated to. I have the tendency to think multiple steps ahead. Contrary to others, I initially picked a character ahead of the action in the first exercise before understanding the theme of the class.

We began with differentiating slow vs fast movements to cross the room. Everyone who chose to take slow movements seemed to associate slow to sadness, depression, laziness, lethargy or morbid obesity. Instead, I was Nobunaga Ichiro, a samurai who was practicing his katas. I chose for my actions to instead be deliberate. A character who was intensely focused on the action at hand. My fast action centered on a tennis player during a match.

The second exercise was direct vs indirect action to cross the room. I opted for latter first and like many, went for a sneaky approach. At first I thought of making the character a thief of some kind, but as several others had already that idea, I swapped midway to a parent of a newborn who was sneaking around the house trying to avoid waking up the baby. The direct action had me emulate a train with the sobriquet of the “Red Rocket”.

Can you feel the _____ tonight?

Our next class involved emotions. We were instructed to perform scenes holding specific emotions. So for example, 1 participant would have to be angry, where the other had to be happy throughout. Other exercises worked on the emotional spectrum. We had to act out an emotion at level 1 through 10. Our teacher further explained when a scene plays out, one way to elicit a response is for a gradual increase of our emotional state on that spectrum (e.g., start the scene at a 3, and by the time we reach the climax of the scene we would be at a 10).

In particular, these exercises were meant to have us understand the outlook of the character(s) and their view of the situation they find themselves in.

Can you repeat the question?

The following class centered around asking questions. Often times, we might be confused or lack direction. We were shown by asking questions, how we can get feedback from our scene partner. Exercises had us often interact only through questions.

One game we played was a “last improv player standing” where two of us would be on stage and could only speak by asking questions to the other. Whomever screwed up, would “lose” and be replaced by someone else. I failed to win the two rounds as I was stumped on what to say when more or less asked my own question back to me.

Funny enough, when I explained this game to friends of mine at my birthday party, one tried to play the game with me. We were interrupted after a few minutes but I felt he was on the ropes.

 

Improv: It’s good to be king

Our last class was dedicated to status. The status we perceive of ourselves within society and how we perceive society or other members within. All our exercises (except the first one which I was partially late for) focused on playing roles of individuals with different status. One of the first exercises was to portray someone with a positive outlook towards everyone and high social status and walk around the room and react or greet one another. Our instructor would then change between high/low social status and positive/negative outlooks.

We were then asked to volunteer for what turned out to be a group exercise. I took the lead and was the first one up on the stage. When he then asked for one of the two of us to raise our hands, I did so. He proclaimed me king, and the other volunteer my guard. The other classmates were petitioners at court hoping to speak with me. Each person presented me with different stories or grievances for me to resolve.

The role years of RPGs had prepared me for.

At first, everyone seemed to equate high social class with high status. Our instructor challenged that assumption by having us play with various situations where we’d contrast or compete against each other on who was the lowest or highest status. The takeaways of the evening were to determine how this reflects on characterization. I found it was easier to craft a persona with the additional information.

Red Flags

It’s been a while since I discussed my dating life. I rather not comment on something in progress, but the topic of red flags did come up. It made me think, as I am prone to do, on some of my failures on the dating scene for failing to pick up on these red flags. In essence, red flags for those who might not know, are just warning signs of behaviour or aspects which are deal breakers for someone in a relationship context.

I indirectly touched on this topic in one of my posts. However, that was just the tip of the shit iceberg. Shitberg if you prefer. So without further ado, here are some of my “learning moments” in dating.

Plan B 

This is a pretty straightforward one and which I encountered earlier this year… with 3 consecutive women. In this case, I was an alternative for the woman who didn’t seem ready to commit to a relationship. I was the “fall black plan” whether it wasn’t working out with their current love interest or “until something better showed up”. Long delays between responses or constant last minute cancellations despite apologies it would not re-occur. The most egregious case was one where after not seeing each other for two months I stupidly agreed to see the woman again. We were to meet at the Old Port near the Science Centre. About a half hour before our date, she sent me an email saying two of her friends would be along with us. Too late to back out, I still went. However, in my defense, I had intended to confront her in person about this before proceeding with the date. I didn’t appreciate being taken for granted and the parameters of the date being changed.

Due to transporation issues with the metro (subway for non-Montrealers), I was 15 minutes late. I was without my cell phone due to having to lend it to a coworker who lost hers. I have a corporate cell phone you see. A situation I had explained to my date. Anyways, I waited about 20 minutes at the agreed meeting area and she was nowhere to be found. There was an office party taking place in a reserved area and I went to the front and asked if the woman in question was an invitee. To which, the organizers confirmed she was. So, the only reason she had invited me was because it was convenient to meet after a social event. The organizers were kind enough to allow me to go into the private area but she wasn’t there either. Mildly irate, I left and met some friends I met at improv for Karaoke. Later that night, the woman sent me an email asking me where I was and so forth. When I explained I arrived, she admonished me for not getting in touch with her. She had waited a whole 20 minutes before leaving. Considering the numerous times she cancelled at the last minute, I did not deign to dignify her admonishment with a response.

The Ultimatum

The ultimatum came from the third woman with whom I had more than 1 date. She was a viola musician studying for her doctorate in music. After a pleasant first date, we agreed to meet again after my next 24/7 emergency pager duty week. Thus it came to my surprise when she called me on the Monday afternoon asking if I could give her a lift to a private concerto she was playing at. One I wouldn’t be allowed to attend. Already, being asked to be a chauffeur after a single date was not exactly polite. At the time I lived on the South Shore and her concerto was scheduled in the middle of rush hour. I ignored the warning sign though and went on to explain to her I couldn’t accommodate her request because I am obligated to respond to any emergencies within 15 minutes for work. If I’m stuck in the middle of traffic, I wouldn’t be able to do so. You see, she had never had a 9 to 5 job in her life despite being 30. Growing up, both her parents were artists as well. She did not understand the concept of a regular routine job. I chalked it up to ignorance and we saw each other twice more.

Nearly all my family members are in Europe and due to my parents eloping from Poland back in the day, I am more an acquaintance than an actual family member to my relatives. So when It was Christmas, I had volunteered to be on pager duty to allow my coworkers to spend time with their families. On the night of the 23rd, the woman called me and asked if I could come with her to her teacher’s Xmas lunch on the 25th. I explained to her once more I couldn’t and why but I would be happy to see her after my pager duty. She then told gave me the ultimatum: “If you want me to be your girlfriend, you have to quit your job.” I have yet to be unemployed.

Sugar daddy

We all have our “types”. For some reason, there’s a mutual attraction with Persian women. Those I have met in a romantic context were always well-educated and we did have good to fantastic chemistry. This woman however was not entirely fluent in English and she had recently been let go from her job. She was very preoccupied with her financial situation, which is understandable. During our first date, she would always steer the conversation back towards finances. It was difficult to maintain a positive conversation to establish rapport. I explained to her I would like to meet her again but perhaps at a time she wasn’t stressed out. She seemed to be genuinely nice person. Her reply was to accuse me of being selfish and calling my integrity in question. When that failed to persuade me, she tried to guilt me into helping support her.

As some people have told me, I am far too nice for my own good. I suggested she apply to my company and even offered a reference if she required. However, I did not want to be in a relationship with a foundation of guilt or where there is a power imbalance or dependency involved. I haven’t heard back from her since, nor do I wish to in a romantic context after the finale of the exchange. I’m hoping this doesn’t blow up in my face if she did apply over the last few months.

Improv: Level Up!

Today was my first level 2 class at Montreal Improv. This session we’re a much smaller group; down to 9 (albeit one person was missing) from the previous 20. While it was disappointing to see many of my level 1 classmates would not be making the jump, it was good to see many familiar faces; we were six of us. It is understandable with the Summer as many embark on trips to make the most of the weather. With the new job, I had to reschedule my own vacation until the fall.

On the positive side, the smaller group will allow us to better build chemistry with one another. I found it was certainly easier to play along with the other 5 from level 1 as we were more familiar with each other. I also found the venue of the lesson to be much better. We were in a slightly smaller area with much better lighting. We also didn’t have two columns in the way. The volume level of the class wasn’t as deafening during the one on one exercises.

As part of the first class, we went through many of the storytelling exercises we had already gone through during level 1 but the instructor was more hands on. He would occasionally interject and ask rhetorical questions of us on the progress of the scene or exercise. I found this was a welcome change to continue to improve our skills. My level one instructor stressed he wanted to create an open environment. This class appears to be more about exploring the situations we create and the characters we’re portraying.

After an initial intervention from the instructor, I thought I was quicker on the draw as he suggested I try to project more the words or actions I am taking to my partners in the exercise. Although I’ve never taken an acting class, I do feel this first experience is a bit closer to what that might be than what I experienced in the first. I really appreciated the feedback as well.

As for the highlights, my favourite moment was a “pixar story” I started with “Once upon a time there was a six foot, man eating chicken named Joel”. Through the story he was forced to reform his ways after the K-mart stopped selling chickens and as a result he lost a whole bunch of weight and looked sexy. Until finally, a Walmart replaced the K-Mart and the chickens became plentiful once more. I concluded by stating and “with his new sexy body he was able to pick up all the chicks.” Yes, I was kind of proud of that pun.

Improv 4: Curtain Call

Last night was our final class together. Although we had all known each other for a short amount of time, I couldn’t help but feel a certain melancholy at the start of the night. My previous experience has led me to believe many of these passengers on this road will step off and go on their separate ways. More on this later. Nevertheless, we were encouraged to bring our A game and the energy level rose quickly.

This week’s class felt like we were reviewing what we had learned over the past few weeks. Although we retread some exercises, each had a bit of a twist. The collaborative story was altered to fit the “Pixar formula”:

They forgot to include the part when you make millions of dollars.

We later moved on to work on platforming where we were given one of the “who, what, and where” and had to quickly establish the other two within 3 lines of dialogue. One of our classmates is an aspiring actor and his skill really shined through. When given a bit of direction, he rapidly developed a character before the scene began. This enabled him to draw attention throughout the scene by his mannerisms and body language. Later that night, he explained he had taken miming classes in the past and demonstrated the skills he learned more directly. During my own performance, I tried the same, but perhaps I was too mechanical in my approach or focused too heavily on an action rather than mannerisms. Something to reflect upon for the next session.

The running gag throughout the whole show was another classmate who would always mime placing his drink on the floor. The joke being he could easily pretend there was a table nearby to set his drink on. The best new exercise was “tableau”. In it, we would have three people call out an object or person and pose in the middle of a circle formed by the rest of the group. Those outside the pose would then call one of the three by what they were mimicking and creating a new tableau. My finest moment was in response to “fireman”, I called out calendar.

Sorry ladies, I’m not going to post a beefcake 😉

In honour of both the ending of an amazing experience and a fellow classmates’ birthday, I baked a cake for everyone. My success rate is now at 50%! In a way, it was my way of expressing my genuine and sincere thanks for the overwhelmingly positive experience this endeavour has been. I’ve met 20 individuals I would otherwise not meet through my regular social circles. I sincerely hope to maintain and develop as many of these relationships as I can going forward now that I have more free time. If it does not happen, I remain thankful for the memories. I will keep to my word of not including names involved as I never sought or asked permission. If any feel I characterized them incorrectly, I truly apologize and will redact the offending statement.

After class and cake, most of the group went to the Old Orchard on St-Laurent and mingled. The topic of the level 2 classes came up. Unfortunately, due to the Summer, many are going on vacation so the group will not remain entirely intact. Still, there was talk about getting together for board games and for karaoke (tonight in fact). There was also talk of a trip to Ottawa for our nation’s holiday.

As the night went on, talk turned towards relationships, and the male vs female experience in dating. While I’ve written at length about the topic before, there was a moment of discomfort when the threat of sexual assault and harassment crept into the conversation. Both subjects are often taboo, but I do enjoy earnest and thoughtful conversation on it especially when women are involved for the different perspective. My discomfort came when I was being pulled into a certain position which I did not agree with. As in many things, I hold a nuanced view. I won’t go into it here, but it was somewhat pleasing when the birthday girl stated she recognized me as a feminist. I write somewhat because I feel that is too limiting a term for my general outlook. I am a white male and as such benefit from a certain level of privilege. Nevertheless, I strive to be inclusive and try to empathize with the experience of others. For further evidence of Facebook’s algorithms analyzing our behaviour, I was suggested the following video this morning:

Some of the arguments in the above video were brought up during the talk. One of the lines that struck me the most was at the 2:00 minute mark. A lot of food for thought.

Improv 3: Shock the world!

As much fun as I’ve had so far in improv, I found our third class to be the most challenging but also stimulating. A good deal of the evening focused on body language and establishing eye contact. Both aspects which I find are difficult to me.

Growing up, I was quite shy. I was verbally picked on by my peers (read other students). I wasn’t entirely surprised. I was the sole anglophone in a French school. I had a foreign last name. I was also overweight. Later, when I had the opportunity to go to private school, I was probably from the least well to do family there and some students were quick to point it out. Fortunately, the potential abuse never escalated very far. I was also one of the tallest in the class throughout school. Anyone who attempted to bully me through physical violence learned to regret it. However, this ostracism led me to subconsciously perceive myself as a less valuable member of the school community. I’d often avoid eye contact or keep people at arm’s length. This further exacerbated my introversion; hence the shyness.

I’m far more conscious now of my body language than I was as a teen. Yet, I still find myself going back to those old habits. I usually have to make the effort to break them. Since joining the class, I find it’s not as difficult though. The group has been very welcoming and the positive atmosphere certainly helps. I think in a way, the teacher must have picked up on it. I had to enact the scene entirely through “telepathy”. Thus compelling us to utilize our facial expressions and body language to convey the dialogue. We both managed to illicit a good deal of laughter from our fellow classmates without going into histrionics. Everyone had their own versions of the scene. My favourite was one where the boss was disgusted with the scent of the person being terminated while the now ex-employee was enamored with the boss’ scent. Another fun one involved a suspicious boss firing a depressed employee.

Another exercise involved providing the context of a scene. The first person would provide who were the characters involved. The second person would provide the location, with the first person providing the action (the what). Some of the answers were quite amusing like a pair of pizza pockets in a stomach fighting off the enzymes. Prior to that, we played a game of word association which served as an excellent precursor. During one of the passes, I was presented with “Pauline Marois”. I tried to stifle my laugh when the first word that popped in my head was “cow”.

Finally, during a freestyle platforming, I participated in a scene. I began by acting as though the other person was in the bathroom for over an hour and I had to use the facilities. Her immediate response was a bit harsher than I expected. I suspect this inspired me to continue the rest of the back and forth in a more antagonistic manner. It was quite shocking how quickly the matter escalated even though we were simply acting within the scene. It devolved into my partner taking a pregnancy test and turned into my character being her brother; a controlling asshole. It was definitely outside of my comfort zone. I’ll have to think on why all that came out.

After class, we met at McGibbins once more in what is becoming our tradition. We had a lot of fun and strangely enough the topic briefly touched upon our dating lives. While I won’t go into the details of the lives of others, and this blog already has posts about my dating life, I did get something out of it. I’d been considering getting a tattoo but could not decide upon what. I was debating between an optical illusion to reflect my subtle but insightful nature or something to show how I wanted to break through my stoic demeanour. One of the women there talked about how she felt a man who could accurately describe the symbolism of the boa and the elephant from The Little Prince was a sort of a turn-on for her. Back in CEGEP, I had a French class devoted almost entirely to the works of Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. I wrote a 10 page dissertation on the book although I no longer have the text. I suspect I put it in the recycling bin in preparation for my move to my condo. Long story short, I was struck with an epiphany:

Image taken from google.