So I recently started dating again after the end of my last relationship. Things started on the right foot with a couple of first dates here and there. We didn’t establish good enough chemistry to pursue the relationship further but I did feel less anxious about proceedings and being more comfortable in the context. And then a streak-slump hit.
I’ve had 10 first dates in a row cancel at the last minute or plain stood me up. This was then followed by the ghosting treatment from all but a single exception. I’m not quite sure what to make of it. Now, I understand if they didn’t want to see each other again after a first date, but this is just strange behaviour. Nine out of the 10 were women I encountered over Tinder. So I’m curious if this is a “thing” common with the dating community that started sometime in December to February or limited to users of this app. Full disclaimer here, I don’t “DTF” or look for casual sex. The dates were all with women with the expressed mutual intent of finding a potential long term relationship partner.
I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand it’s a rejection but doesn’t carry the sting following an actual date. I can rationalize it away in thinking “her loss” or “if she acts like this, I’m better off”. A sentiment others have expressed to me when I answer questions about my romantic life. On the other, this is a trend and a big waste of time on my part and to the women in question. It’s becoming a running gag of mine to make myself laugh at the situation. To my friends who aren’t dating, it is validation for their “bachelor 4 life” attitude. Those in couples view it as a scare tactic to stay together and not go back to dating. Either way, it’s very demotivating but you got to dust yourself off and try again.